Fam Jam

Jen and I went to Carrollton last weekend for my niece's "church dedication". Something we were a little mystified by and that we kept referring to as her "getting jesus-ified". Turns out they just put the parents on stage and they say some shit and everybody claps and that's it.

Sounds harmless enough, right?

This particular debacle was accompanied by something their church refers to as "Fam Jam".

Yes.

Fam Jam.

Fam Jam consists of skits whose meanings and lessons are barely discernible combined with some dance routines and general dignity-killing jackassery. Jen gets so embarrased for other people sometime that it makes her really, really uncomfortable.

I, on the other hand, delight in these things.

I realize that those involved are just trying to liven up the church service, but it was bad.

So, so bad.

This poor woman comes out on stage to direct the "service" and she has a little hat on that's crooked ( an attempt to make her look cool?) and I had just an inkling of how terrible this whole thing would be.

I think, really, that I felt the worst for the youth leader/director people. I know they mean well, but it's kind of like entertainment proselytizing. It's painful to watch.

I glanced over at my sister's father-in-law at one point and he looked like if you'd given him a gun, he'd have happily shot himself right then and there.

About 20 minutes into it, they had a video presentation. It was some woman who had "health problems" ( for some bizarre reason, they never got more specific. Was it Gnorrhea? Cancer? Irritable Bowel Syndrome ? ) It's her and her daughter and the daughter is maybe 9 years old and mumbling incoherently throughout the film about asking jesus for help and the mom hugs her a lot and that's basically it.

At the end of the little film my nephew ( 5 years old, mind you ), who is sitting in my lap, says to no one in particular:

"Oh, boo hoo."

No wonder we get along so well.